ABANDONMENT, DENIAL, REJECTION, GUILTY SHAME
Daily write up Sunday may 26
Today I would like to address a deep shame topic, that most of us carry, especially these days with a lot of single moms and no father or a stepdad, that is really not there for you.
This same topic is Abandonment, Denial, Rejection, Guilty, SHAME.
We all experience shame in our lives and in a multitude of ways. The shame I'm mentioning today is about father abandonment, father rejection, father denial, guilty for leaving mom to be with dad, feeling like we don't have a dad is our fault, mom and dad broke up because of me, it's my fault my parents aren't together, etc., type of shame.
When we carry this type of shame we go through life controlling situations and people to feel safe, we have a fear of rejection, fear of being abandoned, we want to feel safe by controlling every situation or person to feel safe, we seek approval, acceptance and we seek to support but we tend to sabotage it before it grows into something beautiful due to fear of abandonment or rejection due to childhood shame.
An example in my life with this type of shame and what I have witnessed with clients is around the ages of 6 to 8 we tend to want to wander away from mom and seek out quantity and quality time with dad. This is the daddies little girl, daddies prince, dads boy, etc. Usually, well for me we tend to want to spend the early childhood with mother but as we grow up we generically almost instinctually at a certain age of our childhood seek out our father for good quality and quantity father bonding. We all of a sudden want to work on the car with dad, paint with dad, mow the lawn with dad, fix and tinker all projects with dad, we just want to be with dad and get away from the mooshie mom stuff.
Well, I was looking for a dad but there was no daddy there, no real father, no real biological father there, nowhere to be found. I started to think it Was my fault my father was not there. Why did my father abandon me or us, why I asked, what did I do.
Then my next option for the male support I was needing in my life was going to be my stepdad(s), well let me tell you, I was met with, rejection, denial, avoidance, lack of support, I do not have time for you, mental, emotional and physical abuse, spankings, go see your mom, I'm not your dad, you always make things tuff when your around, you take up to much time, always makes mistakes, never learns, stupid good for nothing dumb sh#t, etc.
Here in this expanded moment, I experienced a deep wave of shame of abandonment from my dad and stepdads. I also felt shame for wanting to leave my mom to be with daddy, I also experience a deep sense of shame that all this going on is somehow my fault. Must be a reason they are denying, rejecting and abandoning me.
When dad abandons you, results in us thinking we are not good enough for anyone
A lot of us who were raised by a single mom experienced these types or some type of shame along these lines. Where we wanted to be with dad but dad did not want us or dad was not there, or the step dads did not want anything to do with us, abandoned us, rejected us, denied us, etc, to us abandoning our own mom so we can be with dad now, to do dad stuff, not mushy mom stuff which did the very first years of our life.
How do we heal this trauma repressed shame, I do offer healing sessions to get to the core of this shame and many other types of shame we carry by clearing the blocked shame energy on the core, genetic, soul and history level.
There are many other times throughout our life we feel shameful, this is just one of many. I will discuss more as we go along.
Chris Parr
Sirian and Lemurian love and wisdom
Galactic Council of light and love
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